Whats that sound?

Well, there have been a few days of extreme fatigue and tiredness and falling asleep standing up while working. Mostly due to lack of sleep, trying to adjust from nights to days - stuff like that.

Weird/gross moment of the week... month... year... Well it better be - I don't want to have a grosser moment, lets put it that way.

I was feeling tired and a little sick. My diet and digestion have been suffering from the time swings... and I needed the loo. I got into the stall and sat quietly. I have a problem with public toilets, I find them very difficult to use and prefer not to unless I really have to, all due to an incident in childhood where an old man all but climbed over the cubicle partition as I used the toilet. But I manage and try not to let it affect me too much.
Anyway... I'm sat there trying to mind my own... errr... business... and I hear someone go into the stall next to me. Eeek. I don't like this so I'm now being very quiet and trying to make as little noise as possible. I'm also trying hard not to listen to my new neighbour. But something is worming its way into my consciousness. There's a noise. A human made noise. What on earth...? Well its not a body function... it's kind of rhythmic... definitely biological... what is going on?

Oh... Oh no... surely not?

Yup, its the only possible explanation.
He's knocking one out, flicking one off the wrist... He's having a wank. At 11am. In work. With someone (more importantly ME!) in the cubicle next door - less than a metre away.

Thankfully, as this dawns on me, I am finished and manage to get out, wash my hands and leave before the Phantom Yanker emerges from his Fortress of Solitude.
I am happy for people to do what they want in private... But ah, come on! On second thoughts... Don't come on!

Eww.